(Dis)connecting for Valentine’s Day

While shopping for Valentine’s Day this week, I came across this card and had to take a picture, not only because it’s totally relatable but because it got me thinking.  Being connected to our devices is the norm, but at what cost?

Computers, smartphones, tablets and other devices have the danger of becoming like a third party in our relationships.  They take our time and attention.  We want to be connected 24/7 to the outside world without necessarily recognizing that this connection keeps us disconnected from the person sitting next to us.

What message do we send to those we care about when we’d rather be looking online than being actively engaged with them?   The famous couples researcher Dr. John Gottman found that while couples often ignore each other’s emotional needs out of mindlessness, not malice, the end result is instability.  Our satisfaction in relationships declines when we are less attentive, less affectionate, and less in tune with one another.

Can we be willing to put down our devices, look less at the lives of those on Instagram and instead be present for the life we have - with the people we love - now?

This Valentine’s Day, let’s challenge ourselves to use the bed for what it’s for - to reconnect (both physically and emotionally) and to recharge.  And let’s leave the phones out of it.